House on Haunted Hill

1999

Full size poster

Can't say I'm crazy about the generic poster in the ad campaign

Thoughts before seeing the movie...

"House On Haunted Hill" has been remade for a new generation through Robert Zemeckis' and Joel Silver's production company Dark Castle Entertainment, and was released in America just in time for the otherwise arid Halloween movie season.

Director William Malone (HBO's Tales From The Crypt) promises a film every bit as scary and witty as the original, even if acid vats and the flying skeletons of the Emergo process haven't been retained for his version.

The remake retains the basic premise (even the little coffins with the pistols inside!), except for a few changes: millionaire Loren has become BILLIONAIRE "Mr. Price" (a nice touch), an inventor of amusement park attractions. When his socialite wife Evelyn (Famke Jansen) wishes that her birthday party be held at a genuine "haunted house", she draws up a list of friends, which her husband changes to spite her. Six strangers show up, including: Saturday Night Lives Chris Kattan, The Best Man's Taye Diggs, Mortal Kombat's Bridgette Wilson, Sex Lies And Videotape's Peter Gallagher, and Varsity Blues' Ali Carter. Rounding out the cast is needs-no-introduction Elisabeth Hurley, and singer Lisa Loeb in a cameo.

But the biggest draw, next to the contributions of monster maestros KNB EFX? The presence of Jeffrey Combs--yes, Herbert West himself, as an off-his-rocker doctor who manages an insane asylum. The last time fans saw Combs in a mainstream horror vehicle, it was the miserable sequel I Still Know What You Did Last Summer. Let's hope he gets a chance to show off his comedic skills as he did in the Re Animator films or in Peter Jackson's underrated The Frighteners.

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As a longtime Castle enthusiast, I must say that I'm really looking forward to this one, and considering how badly Jan DeBont blew it with his similarly-titled remake of The Haunting (which dropped its "Of Hill House" when Malone's remake went into production), the horror scene needs a new showstopper now that ticket sales for The Sixth Sense are starting to dwindle. Geoffrey Rush, in clips, looks like he's having a blast as a fey combo of Vincent Price and director John Waters, and director Malone's previously done solid work with stories set in confined locations. His 1980 no-budget mutant yarn, Scared To Death, is one of the better shameless Alien rip-offs.

Can't say I'm crazy about the generic poster in the ad campaign (your standard Scream casting call), though, and I am disheartened that someone didn't think to use this film as an excuse to resurrect Castle's outrageous brand of showmanship to today's predictable, antiseptic, movie marketing. Wouldn't it be fun to sign a Free Burial Insurance policy as you picked up your ticket? And wouldn't it be wonderful if the projectionist had aimed the Emergo skeleton at the pinhead sitting behind you who didn't turn off the cell phone?

A movie fan can dream...in the meantime, read my review of House On Haunted Hill to see if it delivers on its promise...

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